My journey to quit porn doesn't just spawn from porn itself, but rather from my desire to only have eyes for my wife. I didn't fall to porn yesterday, but I did find myself lusting over beautiful models, mostly clothed. I want to make sure that I don't waste time with other women period. I need to learn how to have healthy friendships and not look at ladies with dirty intentions. I'm starting a new attempt to keep myself honest. This world is full of references to sex. Television and movies are full of sexy women and infidelity.
The general level of modesty in our country has dropped so drastically in the last twenty years that it becomes so hard to even walk through the mall without noticing some sexy girl with spaghetti straps and a mini skirt. I do alright in public, keeping my eyes to myself and focusing on faces, not cleavage. But when I'm alone, even a simple internet ad gets me to want to look at more women and that often leads to porn.
I want to be fully devoted to my wife. I know, in my heart, that I am already, but I want every aspect of my life to scream my love for her. God didn't create sex to be shared with whomever wants it, but for two, loving people - a husband and wife. I want that special bond with her and her alone.
So here we go again - Attempt Two - Day One.
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